The Myth of the “Perfect Teenager”

Perfect marks on Monday. A competition on Wednesday. A smiling photo by Friday.

Somewhere between deadlines, expectations, filtered posts, and constantly being “on”

socially, many teenagers forget when they last felt okay just being themselves.

Tara (name changed) walks with her friends toward the next building, backpack swinging lightly against her shoulder. She adjusts a loose strand of hair and glances around, careful not to draw attention. Sunshine catches her skin, dimples appearing for a fraction of a second as she laughs at a friend’s joke — but the smile doesn’t quite reach her eyes.

Her gaze drifts to classmates she admires: the one who just won the student council election, another practicing dance steps perfectly, someone who always seems surrounded by friends. Tara wants the same not just in one thing, but in everything. She sketches late at night, hums songs while studying, and tries to perfect her dance routines in silence. She replies in group chats promptly, posts photos that look effortless, and tries to stay connected. Every achievement, every appearance feels like a checkpoint she must reach to matter.

“I feel like I’m always trying, but no matter what I do, it never feels like enough,” Tara says quietly, biting her lip. “If I don’t match up in one area, I start worrying about the next. And I always notice someone else doing better.”

Comparisons shadow her every day. Group chats are full of awards shared excitedly, high marks celebrated, performance videos and artwork passed around. Even outside of school, notifications pop up with images of success and belonging. According to a Pew Research Center survey, 68% of teens (ages 13–17) say they feel a lot of pressure to get good grades, and 41% say they feel a lot of pressure to fit in socially with peers. Pressure to excel academically and socially is very real for many teenagers.

“No one really notices when you succeed quietly,” Tara continues. “But the smallest slip‑up gets highlighted because people expect you to be perfect.”

Her voice almost dissolves into the hallway chatter.

When school is out, Tara sits on the edge of her bed, notebooks, sketchbooks, and worksheets scattered around her. She traces circles on the page with her pen, looking out the window at the street below. For a few moments, she stops adjusting, stops checking, stops trying and just lets herself exist.

“Even though I know I shouldn’t compare myself to others,” she whispers, “that nagging feeling never quite goes away”.

Her story reflects a generation of teens stretched between personal growth and external validation. Adolescence isn’t only academic pressure, it’s also social expectations, extracurricular pursuits, and the unending sense that you must be good at everything: exams, sports, art, dance, music, leadership, and maintaining a vibrant social life.

Being a teenager wasn’t meant to look perfect; it was meant to look messy - stumbling, hesitating, failing, and trying again. But society’s expectations demand constant excellence in all areas, making adolescence feel like a high‑pressure test rather than a time to explore, grow, learn and simply live.

Expecting teenagers to excel in everything, all the time, and never fail in school, on the field, in artistic pursuits, and in their social circles which is just unrealistic. Tara’s experience is a reminder that behind every medal, every report card, every smiling photo, there are countless hours of stress, comparison, and self‑doubt and this effort alone deserves recognition.

Written by Aditi Gupta, Grade 10, Avasara Academy, Pune

Aditi wrote this article as a participant of the Media-Makers Fellowship's Nov'25 cohort.